Moments of Clarity

Wednesday- March 30, 2022

Dear Marion,

 I’ve missed the warmer days that we are soon to be settling into for a stretch. March often feels like a mixed bag of weather and these past few weeks are living up to its expected characteristics. A rollercoaster casting us with a warm spring day of 70 degrees and plunging into the next with 32 degrees and a chance of flurries. We’ve rolled through the extreme weather of three seasons in the last few weeks and I am anxious for the more steady temps and colorful bursts of new blooms coming our way. With the extreme changes in temperature and living along the coast, it seems as though we have been visited by longer periods of fog than is typical. I have loved watching it blow in, often blanketing our town only to lift and dance its way out letting the sun take full stage. With the break in the fog, it feels like a moment of clarity, a breath of cool air bringing me back to what is important.

 I turn on the news and there is so much horror and devastation in Ukraine that it makes one feel helpless. Local news has shown an increase in violence and hate crimes as well as negative rhetoric and deep divides in politics. I am craving something good, some hope to grab onto or some idea to act upon that could help relieve at least one someone’s burden. As an escape on Sunday, I turned on the Oscars and thought of you and how we loved to watch the fashion and laugh during the hosts' interpretation of the year's entertainment. Is this a frivolous way to spend time? Yes, but I enjoy it and this year I found I was more interested than I had been in a few years. I had only seen a couple of movies, but it felt hopeful to see different stories and more diverse and interesting views. As much as I enjoy the Oscars, my family does not but they accept that this is my moment for me. This time is spent with me stretched out on the couch without anyone to interrupt (well mostly) and me laughing or awwwing out loud unabashedly while drinking my tea or even some ice cream. Half way through, a joke was not received well from a comedian/presenter on stage and what I thought to be a comic turn was actually a violent slap and a mouthful of threatening rhetoric from a previously highly regarded actor in the audience. I cannot express how sickened I felt in the moment and even still three days later. Searching for a distraction, I’ve walked each morning(since) around the lake and taken in the new blooms, listening to the sounds of spring mixed in with squalls of snow and sleet. My cheeks so early in the morning felt the pinch of wind combined with frigid air and the sun that made it all bearable. At the end of my walk I feel better but in the corner of my mind is how does someone appear to have it all, including a sunny disposition, snap and act in a way they never had before? How does the person receiving the slap that was witnessed in front of peers, on stage, and televised around the globe walk gracefully away without a violent response. Shock? Probably, but also a very strong sense of self and integrity. A moment of clarity is much needed.

 I watched a movie with your granddaughter that I know you would love called Coda and it was every bit as beautiful, heartwarming, hopeful, and heroic in a way that I have been craving. As much as I had wanted to see the movie when it first opened, I once again thought it interesting that when I needed it’s message the most was at the time I sat and absorbed. This movie Coda claimed the Oscar for best picture and seems to have resonated with many viewers. Perhaps it is the hope that many of us are craving and is certainly a beautiful example of the strength we embody when we feel heard and seen in the way we find desirable.

Talk Soon,

Forever Yours

Quote:

“A smile is a curve that sets everything straight.”

~

“If you don’t have wrinkles, you haven’t laughed enough.”

Phyllis Diller

American stand-up comedian, actress, author, musician, and visual artist

1917-2012